Consumer Reports rates light beers (and hot dogs)

Last weekend I was reading a recent Consumer Reports magazine that reviewed hot dogs and light beers. I enjoy a good hot dog from time to time, and I was interested to see their rankings.

Hebrew National won the blind taste test for best-tasting hot dog. I've never had a Hebrew National hot dog before, although I never shy away from kosher foods. If I had a choice between a kosher dill pickle and one that's not kosher (meaning that it probably fell on the floor since it wasn't prepared under rabbinical supervision), I'd take the kosher!

I've now come to understand that a kosher dill pickle is usually not kosher in the sense that it was prepared under rabbinical supervision, which would ensure that no utensil in contact with the pickles had been in contact with food that was not kosher. Rather, it is a pickle made in the traditional manner of Jewish New York City pickle makers with generous addition of garlic to the brine. But that's not my point here.

I respect Consumer Reports and I think that the hot dog test is good one. But then I read the light beer article. The light beer results are oh so wrong!

The big "winners" of the test were as follows:

1. Michelob Ultra Amber
2. Michelob Light
3. Michelob Ultra
4. Coors Light

I've tasted a Michelob Ultra before and it's a perfect choice for people who don't like beer. It basically tastes like water with some sugar and artificial beer flavoring. It's definitely in the bottom 10 beers I've ever had (and I've had pizza beer brewed with garlic cloves and oregano). Beer Advocate even gives it a 96% disapproval rating. It's quite bad.

I've also tasted Coors Light and basically rank it below every beer starting with the letters BUD (and that's a bad thing).

Sam Adams Light was 5th on the list and I agree that it should be up there somewhere. That's the one shining star of their rankings. Miller Lite finished 11th and despite the fact that Miller's own blind tests showed Miller Lite has more taste, Bud Light finished 8th. There were also bunch of other bad beers that finished in the top 10 like Keystone Light, Busch Light, and Natural Light. But those are cheap, light beers and everyone knows what they are getting to when they buy them. Michelob pretends they are a premium drink.

Supposedly the Consumer Reports taste testers focused on "whether a beer tasted fresh and had a balanced mix of floral, fruity, malted grain, hops and other appropriate flavors." I guess I agree that Michelob Ultra tastes fresh - just like water!

I guess I don't like light beer in general, but if I had to drink one it certainly wouldn't be anything made by Michelob (thus by Anheuser-Busch).

Do yourself a favor - skip all the Consumer Reports light beers and have a local craft beer instead. If you're worried about the calories, have one less beer.