'Hearty Eater' Says Buffet Banned Him

Homer Simpsons: All you can eat? Ha!

Lionel Hutz: Mr. Simpson, this is the most blatant case of fraudulent advertising since my suit against the film, The Never-Ending Story.

From Yahoo! News:

HOUMA, La. - A 6-foot-3, 265-pound man says a restaurant overcharged him for his trips to the buffet line, then banned him and a relative because they're hearty eaters. A spokesman for the restaurant denies the claim.

Ricky Labit, a disabled offshore worker, said he had been a regular for eight months at the Manchuria Restaurant in Houma, eating there as often as three times a week.

On his most recent visit, he said, a waitress gave him and his wife's cousin, 44-year-old Michael Borrelli, a bill for $46.40, roughly double the buffet price for two adults.

"She says, 'Y'all fat, and y'all eat too much,'" Labit said.

Labit and Borrelli said they felt discriminated against because of their size. "I was stunned, that somebody would say something like that. I ain't that fat, I only weigh 277," Borrelli said, adding that a waitress told him he looked like he a had a "baby in the belly."

Houma accountant Thomas Campo said the men were charged an extra $10 each on Dec. 21 because they made a habit of dining exclusively on the more expensive seafood dishes, including crab legs and frog legs.

"We have a lot of big people there," said Campo, who spoke for owner Li Shang, whose English is limited. "We don't discriminate."

Labit denied ever being told he would be asked to pay more than the standard adult price.

The argument grew heated, and police were called.

The police report states, "The incident was settled when the management advised that the bill was a mistake and, to appease Ricky, the meal was complimentary."

Labit said he insisted on paying but was told not to come back. He complained that when seafood on the buffet line runs out, the restaurant only grudgingly cooks more.

Campo said the proprietress tries to reduce waste of quality food, he said.

"Food is for eating, not toys for your child," reads a sign posted on a wall in typewritten text. A handwritten addition reads "Or 20% added."

Year-end movie reviews

I watched a few movies over the holiday break. Some were really good. Here's the rundown.

Gone Baby Gone

Directed by Ben Affleck. Starring his brother Casey Affleck, Michelle Monaghan, Ed Harris, and Morgan Freeman.

Based on the Dennis Lehane novel (he also wrote Mystic River) about two Boston area detectives investigating a little girl's kidnapping, which ultimately turns into a crisis both professionally and personally.

I thought this was a good movie that didn't follow the usual predictable story line for the most part. Casey Affleck does a great job playing a believable character and I like any movie with Ed Harris playing a bad-ass. Michelle Monaghan does OK in her role. She also played Tom Cruise's wife in Mission: Impossible 3. I recommend this movie.


Before the Devil Knows You're Dead

Starring Philip Seymour Hoffman, Ethan Hawke, and Marisa Tomei.

When two brothers organize the robbery of their parents' jewelery store, the job goes horribly wrong, triggering a series of events that sends them, their father and one brother's wife hurtling towards a shattering climax.

This was one of my favorite films of the year. It's a great Fargo-like family crime story where nothing goes right. I like Philip Seymour Hoffman and he plays a great role in this film. I recommend this movie.



Once

I hadn't heard of this movie until I read about it on a couple of lists of best movies of 2007. It stars Glen Hansard from the Irish rock band The Frames and Markéta Irglová as struggling musicians. Hansard and/or Irglová composed and performed all but one of the original songs in the movie.

It's described as a modern-day musical about a busker and an immigrant and their eventful week, as they write, rehearse and record songs that tell their love story.

The film was shot for only $160,000 received the World Cinema Audience Award for a dramatic film at the 2007 Sundance Film Festival. I liked it a lot and thought is was interesting and unpredictable. I recommend it.


I am Legend

Staring Will Smith. Years after a plague kills most of humanity and transforms the rest into monsters, the sole survivor in New York City struggles valiantly to find a cure.

I thought this movie was entertaining, although it wasn't great. I thought 28 Days Later... did a much better job telling the same story and was much more frightening. The computer animated zombies definitely detracted from I am Legend. I preferred normal actors playing the zombies in 28 Days Later. Real people wanting to kill you is much scarier than computer monsters, in my opinion.

I did like the movie though, and it's worth watching. Maybe wait for the DVD.


I'm Not There

This is the biographical film inspired by the life of musician Bob Dylan. I was eagerly anticipating watching it, but I was disappointed with the result. The storyline was too disjointed and difficult to follow for me to enjoy the film.

I'm Not There depicts the Dylan through seven distinct stages of his life by using six different actors (Marcus Carl Franklin, Ben Whishaw, Heath Ledger, Christian Bale, Richard Gere, and Cate Blanchett).

Wikipedia says the film tells its story using non-traditional techniques, similar to the poetic narrative style of Dylan's songwriting. It takes its name from the Dylan outtake "I'm Not There", which was never officially released until being included on the film's official soundtrack album.

I guess the poetic narrative didn't work for me. The acting was very good and the music was fantastic, but the story was weird and didn't flow and I lost patience trying to keep track of what was happening after the first hour.

I read several very positive reviews of this film (one that called this the best movie of 2007) and I had high expectations for it. Even though I am a big Bob Dylan fan, I don't recommend this movie, unless you just want to enjoy the music.

I did get the two disc soundtrack after watching the film and it's great. Eddie Vedder, Sonic Youth, Richie Havens, John Doe, Yo La Tengo, Charlotte Gainsbourg, Jack Johnson, and Glen Hansard and Markéta Irglová (from the movie Once) all perform on it.


Juno

Starring Ellen Page, Michael Cera, Jennifer Garner, and Jason Bateman.

Faced with an unplanned pregnancy, an offbeat young woman makes an unusual decision regarding her unborn child.

I read several positive reviews of this film and I agreed with them. This movie is funny and touching and very entertaining. The lead actress Ellen Page played her role perfectly and I think she is likely to win an award for her acting. I recommend this movie.

I saw this movie at the Marcus North Shore theater in Mequon on a Friday night and that was probably a mistake. Half of the theater was filled with spoiled North Shore teens with their Ugg boots and North Face jackets who constantly opened their mobile phones throughout the movie to check for text messages. The kids were also chatting during parts of the movie and their bright phone screens in the darkness annoyed and distracted me and also reminded me that I'm now a grumpy old man. It's just another reason why I prefer watching movies at home.

Best Madison Beers of 2007

Robin Shepard from the Isthmus lists the best Madison beers of 2007 (Madison and the surrounding areas, I guess). The complete descriptions and links can be found on their website. There are some great beers listed here, and I haven't tried them all yet.

Here's the breakdown:

Most surprising beer
New Glarus Brewing Company -- Smoke on the Porter

Biggest beer
Jacob Leinenkugel Brewing Company -- Big Eddy Russian Imperial Stout

Best seasonal beer
Tyranena Brewing Company -- Gemuetlichkeit Oktoberfest

Best beer for a nightcap
Central Waters Brewing Company -- Bourbon Barrel Stout

Best summertime beer
Furthermore Beer -- Fatty Boombalatty

Lowest-cost beer with "some" flavor
Minhas Craft Brewery / Joseph Huber Brewing Company -- Berghoff Red

Best beer for a bowl game
Ale Asylum -- Hopalicious

Best beer to ring in the new year
Great Dane Pub and Brewing Company -- Merry Isthmus Ale

Best beer after shoveling snow
Capital Brewery -- Autumnal Fire

Best beer of 2007
Lake Louie Brewing: Louie's Reserve (L.R.)

The best toilet paper ever

Charmin Extra Strong is the only toilet paper that I'm going to buy from now on. It has the perfect combination of strength and comfort, just like Clint Eastwood in The Bridges of Madison County.

I can never go back to weak regular toilet paper that falls apart with each use. You could use this stuff to dry your car or wallpaper your kitchen.

Why is it so good? Let's see what Charmin's website has to say about it:

Charmin® Extra Strong holds up better than the regular kitten brand to help get your family clean. That’s because it has uniquely woven FlexWeave fibres for extra strength. And it still has the softness you love!

Wait a minute, what does regular kitten brand mean?

kitten \ˈki-tən\, noun
a young cat; also : an immature or young individual of various other small mammals

The bottom of their website states: Claims valid only in Canada. That explains things a bit, like why they wrote fibres instead of fibers. You know, just like Kellogg's Fruit 'n Fibre, a delicious blend of wholewheat flakes packed with your favorite fruits including raisins, coconut, banana, apple and hazelnuts. Your spoon just can't escape the fruit!

So I did some more research, and apparently all toilet paper in Canada is made out of kittens! To citizens of the United States this might seem cruel, but Canadians have a long history of using kittens in a variety of products such as toilet paper, Canadian bacon, and Labatt Blue beer.

That's one of the reasons why Canada's murder rate is so low - they take out their anger on the kittens instead.

Beer by satellite

I justed discovered a cool website that allows you to download Point of Interest (POI) files to your GPS unit.

The site is called POI Factory and there are tons of free downloads - lists of places that other people created and mapped out the coordinates to - so all you need to do is download the list to your GPS and the new POI's will show up on your map.

They also have locations of red light enforcement cameras to help remind you to not go through a yellow-ish light at certain intersections. Wisconsin doesn't have any of the cameras yet, thankfully, but Chicago has a lot of them.

The site also lets you create your own POI lists and upload them to the site for others to use.

Here are the Wisconsin ones I could find.

• Milwaukee Attractions
• Wisconsin - Door County Attractions
• Wisconsin - Door County Restaurants
• Wisconsin - Lakes
• Wisconsin - Landforms
• Wisconsin Brew Pubs & Breweries
• Wisconsin Elks Lodges
• Wisconsin Ham Radio Repeaters
• Wisconsin Interstate Rest Areas
• Wisconsin military sites (historical)
• Wisconsin State Parks
• Wisconsin Waterfalls
• Wisconsin Wineries

I already downloaded the Wisconsin Brew Pubs & Breweries list - which contained 57 different entries. Now I can search for breweries along my current route or near my current location, or just have my GPS alert me when a brewery is nearby.

Most of the major GPS brands support POI's and the POI Factory is definitely worth a visit.

Mmmmm... beer ice cream

Ben & Jerry’s has created a special beer and donuts flavored ice cream to celebrate the DVD release of The Simpsons Movie.

The new flavor is called Duff 'n D'Oh-Nuts after Homer Simpson's favorite drink and food. It's a combination of cream stout-flavored ice cream mixed with chocolate ice cream and chocolate glazed donuts. There will unfortunately be no real beer in the mix.

It looks like I won't get to try any of it anyway. It's only available this week, on Saturday. And only in Springfield, Vermont, the city that won a contest to be named the official Springfield for the movie.

Do'h!

Oh, I did see the movie and thought it was OK. I enjoyed the new Futurama movie more.

Miller Lite Brewers Collection

Starting next February, Miller is planning to test-marketing 3 new low-calorie beers, part of their new Miller Lite Brewers Collection. The three new beers are Blonde Ale, Amber, and Wheat, each with fewer calories and carbs than a typical beer for that style.

There aren't many successfully light beers in the increasingly popular craft-beer market. These beers should give college girls and fat guys who don't like beer another choice instead of just Miller Lite.

Miller Lite Brewers Collection Wheat will feature a subtle citrus character. Miller Lite Brewers Collection Amber is made with roasted malts and has a mild hop character. Miller Lite Brewers Collection Blonde Ale will offer a "crispness and slight maltiness balanced by a recognizable hop aroma."

For some reason, they won't be testing the new beers in Milwaukee. Minneapolis, Charlotte, San Diego, and Baltimore are the test cities.